Brrrrr

World Summit attendees remained inside today as all North Pole events and activities were canceled for the second day in a row due to inclement weather.

This setback delays review of the logbooks retrieved from the vault beneath NPI headquarters yesterday by Cindy Klaus.

NPI snow plows out in force—some engines failing due to brutal conditions

Cold, really cold

The Annual North Pole Summit meetings slated to get underway this morning at NPI’s North American headquarters were canceled due to gale force winds and -43ºC temperatures.

Cool, really cool

Attendees were forced to remain in their guest rooms while NPI workers scrambled to locate enough La Flamme all-weather outerwear for them.

The suits made popular by Kia Kringle, daughter of NPI CEO Kris Kringle, have been in such overwhelming demand worldwide that NPI inventories are severely depleted.

“It’s an honor to be selected and entrusted with the retrieval of the logbooks from the NPI vault. I’m taking this responsibility quite seriously.”

Cindy Klaus, NPI Executive Vice President

Pomp

Each year, the North Pole, Inc. vaults are opened for several hours so that high-ranking NPI officials may retrieve hard copies of delivery and distribution instructions. Two log books and supporting data will be ceremoniously removed from the vault by NPI Executive Vice President, Cindy Klaus, tomorrow morning in preparation for year-end NOTI (Notice Of Terminated Inclusion) or NIS (Noted Individual, Send) classifications.

The heavily guarded vaults, located deep beneath NPI headquarters, contain everything from NPI’s secret proprietary fuel mixtures to delivery data on 4 billion individuals worldwide. (See photo in Wednesday’s report).

Circumstance

The annual event is equal parts ceremony and symbolism, and signals that preparation for NPI’s coveted SameDay™ worldwide delivery service has been set in motion. The event also marks the beginning of the Annual World Summit held at NPI headquarters each year—which is slated to begin this Saturday.